Guys, Only 2 Shopping Days Left!

That's right, guys, you only have 2 more days to find that perfect gift of overpriced chocolate, ridiculously overpriced flowers, or "you're a fucking idiot for paying this" overpriced jewelry to prove to that special lady in your life that you do in fact love her. It's time to make some grand gesture in the middle of February to make up for the rest of the year when you take her for granted. I mean, it's not like you could really do anything for her the other 364 days of the year to prove your love, you definitely need to blow your money on a "romantic" dinner at a high priced restaurant that doesn't have wings and the game on TV above your table.

Valentine's Day in its current, Americanized, mass-produced, commercialized "you're a bad person if you don't spend $60 on chocolate covered strawberries for your girlfriend" bullshit incarnation is fucking stupid. The fact that so many people buy into it and cause themselves needless stress, debt, and totally fucking pointless fights with their significant other is equally fucking stupid. Just because Kay Jewelers tells you that the only way to show her that you care is to drop $700 on some necklace doesn't mean it's true. In fact, if you do buy that necklace, it means that you are dumb motherfucker for not knowing better.

What I really don't like about the current state of the holiday is the unrealistic expectations and feelings of obligation that commercialization has created. (I feel the same about Christmas, but you'll have to wait until December to get that rant...yeah...like I'll really still be doing this in December...HA.) A gift loses its meaning if it is given out of obligation. A gift should be a sincere token of your appreciation for someone, it should not be something bought in hopes that it is good enough to keep the receiver from being mad at you for either not getting them something or not getting them the right something. A gift given out of obligation is little more than a shallow token of unoriginality and forced recognition. A gift given out of obligation is worthless (even if it does get you a blow job; because next year, that blow job will be more expensive).

However, this feeling of obligation wouldn't exist without the expectation. It's not inherently wrong for someone to want a gift on a day that normally dictates people exchange gifts. What is wrong, however, is for a person to expect something and then be upset if they don't get what they think is "good enough." If you are basing your love and happiness on your partner's ability to drop $100 for roses and a stupid fucking stuffed red bear with some cheesy "I WUV U" bullshit embroidered across its fluffy belly, you are doomed. You will never be happy in love, because you are defining it in the wrong manner.

Loving someone is knowing who they are, what they like, and what will make them happy enough to want to know who you are, what you like, and what will make you happy every single day of the year; not just on a random day in February when Hallmark tells you that you have to pour out your soul to your lover in the form of a $2.95 piece of paperboard that 62,000 other unoriginal bastards will be giving to their lovers that day. If you know your significant other well enough, you should be able to give them enough small gifts (and "gifts" can be defined in myriad ways) throughout the year that Valentine's Day is little more than another day on which to tell them you love them. It should not be a day to break the bank on some trinket in hopes of proving your love is good enough to not get yelled at because FTD told you that you should. If your significant other is shallow enough to be angry at you if you don't get them the exact right thing...run the fuck away. You will never be good enough. (No, guys, don't get your chick Madden 10 if she's never picked up an XBOX controller, there is something to be said for not being a total fucking moron when it comes to giving gifts.)

I'm not saying that giving your significant other something or taking them out to dinner on Valentine's Day is wrong. Just don't buy into the commercialization and mass-production of it all. Be original. Know your partner well enough to come up with something that isn't just another crappy piece of pink shit that any douchebag in a rush tomorrow night could pick up at the grocery store. Then, if they're mad at you because you didn't buy them diamond earrings, you know that it's time for you to kick them to the curb, because they just don't get it. Just don't be surprised if they kick you to the curb if you don't know them well enough to know that they aren't interested in the first 19 seasons of Survivor on DVD.